June 17, 2008

Dr. Steven M. Cohen and Dr. Ari Y. Kelman

Author: rosnersdomain - Categories: Rosner's Guests - Tags: , , , , ,

The frequent readers of Rosner’s Domain are probably familiar with our guests this week.

Dr. Steven M. Cohen is a sociologist of American Jewry and a research professor of Jewish Social Policy at Hebrew Union College’s Jewish Institute of Religion. He was co-author of the seminal book, The Jew Within. In addition, he was a lead contributor to the UJC’s 2001 National Jewish Population Survey. Dr. Ari Y. Kelman is an assistant professor of American Studies at the University of California at Davis. He has written, spoken, and been published widely on American Jewish culture in both a historical and contemporary context.

Their latest study, on which I wrote last week, is called: UNCOUPLED: How our Singles are Reshaping Jewish Engagement (read it here).

A previous study they coauthored (I wrote about it here) revealed the extent to which young Jewish Americans are alienated from Israel. It was labeled: Beyond Distancing: Young Adult American Jews and Their Alienation from Israel.

So, our main topic this week will be the state of young American Jews. Readers can send questions to rosnersdomain@haaretz.co.il.

Dear Mr. Rosner,

I hear that many young Jewish Americans no longer care about Israel because they think the politics of the country and the occupation are so terrible that its not worth their support. Is that true, and are we in danger of losing American Jews?

Thank you,

Avi Lev,
Israel

Yes, we are in danger of losing SOME American Jews, but, as we demonstrate in UNCOUPLED, Israel’s political stances are not particularly the reason for alienation. The right says that left-wing Jewish organizations are doing Israel a disservice by being too critical of Israel. The left says that Israel’s policies are disturbing liberal-minded American Jews to the extent that they are diminishing their attachment. In broad strokes, neither argument is supported by our evidence.

Steven M. Cohen and Ari Y. Kelman

Hello,

A question to the two professors: why is it important that Jewish signgles will be attached to Jewish institutions? Why can’t they join later or not at all?

Deborah, Miami

If we wait until they are in their forties for them to engage in collective Jewish life, we’ll be missing out on all their energy and creativity for 15-20 years. We believe that more Jews should do more Jewish more of their lives. Also, there’s no guarantee that they will return to the institutions they find alien and alienating in their 20s and 30s. And, most fundamentally, the UNCOUPLED deserve a rich Jewish life. Why should they be forced to choose between no involvement or involvement in places they find ill-suited for their needs?

Steven M. Cohen and Ari Y. Kelman

Dear Dr. Cohen and Dr. Kelman,

What’s the factor that will convince young Jews to marry other Jews and not gentiles?

Thank you,

Gabriel Lazaroff

For the most part, young adult Jews actually prefer to marry Jews. Jewish women who marry non-Jews do so three years later, on average, than those who marry Jews. Perhaps these women were waiting for the right Jewish man and found the right non-Jewish man instead. The only effective and immediate way to increase the in-marriage rate is to improve the quality of Jewish life for the UNCOUPLED. Facilitate and support their efforts in culture, spiritual communities, learning, social justice, and connecting through New Media. More UNCOUPLED Jews connected to each other now means more COUPLED Jews connected to each other by marriage in the future. Now that’s NOT the only reason to support self-initiated activities by Jews in their 20s and 30s. But, if you’re concerned about in-marriage, that’s certainly a good reason.

Steven M. Cohen and Ari Y. Kelman

Dear friends,

How do you reconcile:

Less than half of such Jews who are 35 and under believe that Israel’s
destruction would constitute a personal tragedy for them; only small
part of them believe that caring about Israel was an important part of
their Judaism ? from your previous study.

With:

Jewish singles see themselves almost as attached to Israel as the
in-married couples, they care for Israel in similar numbers, and they
are proud of Israel in even higher numbers ? from the new study.

Do these young Americans care about Israel ? or don’t?

Best

SR

Dear Shmuel,

The difference between the two studies in attachment to Israel can be easily explained.

In our study, Beyond Distancing, we found that age is directly related to Israel attachment over the entire age range. Elderly Jews are more attached than middle-aged Jews and both are more attached than younger adult Jews. Our statistical analysis pointed to the major explanation for this trend: the rise in intermarriage among younger Jews. Younger cohorts contain more Jews married to non-Jews, and, increasingly, intermarried Jews who are younger are more distant from Israel than intermarried Jews who are older.

The UNCOUPLED study, of course, focused on the majority of young adults: those who are UNCOUPLED in two senses of the term. They are uncoupled in terms of marriage, and uncoupled in terms of their relationship to organized Jewry. But, and this is an exciting discovery we believe, UNCOUPLED younger Jews feel as attached to Israel as in-married Jews.

This set of findings points to one more reason why the organized Jewish community’s objectives can best be achieved by supporting the endeavors of Jews in their 20s and 30s. Spiritual communities, cultural endeavors, connecting by way of the Internet, social justice activities, and opportunities for Jewish learning are not only important in their own right, in that they provide spaces for UNCOUPLED Jews to express their Jewish commitment. They also serve to strengthen Jewish social networks, which in turn promotes in-group marriage, which in turn, among other positive outcomes, is associated with life-long attachment to Israel.

In short, just like exercise works many wonders on the body, supporting initiatives by and for the UNCOUPLED works many wonders for the present and future of Jewish life in America — and in Israel too!

Steven M. Cohen and Ari Y. Kelman

Dear Steven and Ari,

I got these three questions from readers. I hope you can answer each of them briefly:

1. Why is it that Jews marry so late, do they have less children, and what does it mean for Jewish demography?

Jews are marrying later in conjunction with the rising age of marriage in the US. In addition, Jews have married later than others for a long time owing in part to their higher educational levels, greater professionalization of women, and a tendency toward culturally modern family patterns in general.

2. Do Jews who marry late also have the tendency to marry non-Jews - is age a factor in this decision? if it is, does it mean we should develop ways with which to convince young Jews to marry earlier?

There’s a weak relationship between later marriage and intermarriage. Jewish women who marry non-Jews marry 3 years later than those who marry Jews. Apparently, Jewish women prefer to find Jewish husbands and marry non-Jews more readily as they age.

3. Is there no “singles problem” in the orthodox community?

Calling the matter a “singles problem” is, well, problematic. In any event, Orthodoxy has experienced some increase in marriage age, but not as much as the 90% of American Jews who are not Orthodox.

Dear Professors,

Both in your response to my question - and in the study - you mention the new institutions that are needed to accommodate the “uncoupled”. What kind of institutions can achieve the goal - and isn’t there a problem because young people reject the mere idea of “institutions”?

Thank you,

SR

Shmuel -

We should distinguish between conventional institutions (synagogues, JCCs, federations, and the like) and any organized and intentional endeavor. Thus, the interests of young adults extend to … self-initiated spiritual communities; cultural expressions, particularly those entailing music; the use of online media, such as blogs, ‘zines, social networking, participatory journalism, literature; political engagement and social action; learning opportunities, be it individually (books, texts, Internet, etc.) or collectively (classes, learning festivals, etc.).

Thus, in speaking about new institutions, we are speaking about those institutions which can facilitate those experiences and provide those opportunities. Some of those institutions will be (and are) run by Jews in their 20s and 30s, and some can be created by the established community on their behalf.

We have already written about four of these new areas for engagement in “The Continuity of Discontinuity,” but that study — which focused on a record label (JDub), a spiritual community (Ikar), a ritual theater troupe (Storahtelling), and a salon (in Toronto) — was only the tip of the iceberg. Since “Continuity” was released last spring, we have continued to see a thriving ecology of organized endeavors for and by Jews in their 20s and 30s.

Again, conventional wisdom (which are implicit in your question) is that “next generation Jews are not joiners.” This is not exactly the case. They will participate, and “Uncoupled” shows this quite clearly, but the ways in which they participate will reflect the new shapes and directions of the efforts to serve them. “Uncoupled” documents their strong desire to participate, and the lack of suitable opportunities to do so. So, to say they are not “joiners” is a false conclusion. They are not joiners of traditional institutions, but they are looking for other avenues of engagement.

Sincerely,
Steven M. Cohen
Ari Y Kelman

Dear Professors,

On the one hand, in the press release attached to your new study, you call young Jewish singles the ’swing vote’ of American Judaism. However, in the study itself you say that the tendency to marry late is a “disturbing Phenomenon”. How is this disturbing, and in what way this group will be swinging American Judaism?

Best,

Rosner

We can understand the “disturbing phenomenon” in the following way: the large numbers of uncoupled Jews “disturb” the established equilibrium and patterns of the organized Jewish community in America. For years (at least since the end of the World War II), the majority of American Jewish organizations and institutions catered to families, and specialized in servicing the needs of families with young children. Synagogues, JCC’s, schools, summer camps, etc.
Conventional wisdom holds that only when one’s child reaches school age does a parent think of turning to a congregation or a JCC. And, such wisdom continues, the rationale for joining was simply that these parents wanted to provide Jewish experiences for their children. The findings of “Uncoupled” disturb this conventional wisdom in two important ways.

* “Uncoupled” reflects the pattern that people — lots of people — are not getting married, and are thus less likely to fall into the slipstream of Jewish organizational life.
* Unaffiliation among the uncoupled is not a sign of disinterest. The data clearly shows that uncoupled individuals are interested in Jewish issues, and hold strong, proud Jewish identities.

The juxtaposition of the large number of uncoupled Jews and their high levels of interest suggest that the “problem” does not lie with a generation of apathetic, uneducated, singles who are not interested in Jewish matters, but rather with a dearth of organizations and institutions that are suitable for and attractive to uncoupled Jews in the United States.

Given that more people are remaining uncoupled for longer than ever before (a trend that does not show signs of reversing anytime soon), what’s disturbing is not that Jews in their twenties and thirties are so distant from organized Judaism, just as other Americans their age are increasingly distant from organized religion. What’s disturbing is that the Uncoupled among them express interest in expressing and growing their Jewish commitments, but the organized community has yet to find ways to facilitate, support and multiply opportunities for self-initiated engagement.

March 30, 2008

Paul Golin

Author: rosnersdomain - Categories: Rosner's Guests - Tags: , , , ,

Rosner’s Guest: Paul Golin

Paul Golin is the Associate Executive Director for the Jewish Outreach Institute, an organization dedicated to “foster the creation of scores of Jewish outreach programs from coast to coast”.

He previously served as JOI’s Director of Communications and Strategic Planning. He is a frequent writer and speaker on Jewish outreach and has authored the report The Coming Majority: Suggested Action On Intermarried Households.

We will be discussing this issue of intermarriage and outreach, on which a series of new studies is now available. Readers can send questions to rosnersdomain@haaretz.co.il.

Dear Paul,

You’ve raised great questions, but did not give us your answer. So - “what does it mean to be Jewish? How do we express our Judaism?”

Thank you for this dialogue,

Rosner

Hi Shmuel,

I believe it’s one of our community’s greatest strengths that if you asked those same questions to 100 Jews, you would get 100 different answers - or 150 if the ratio of “two Jews, three opinions” holds true.

Several years ago I took a 30-session weekly course in New York City called Derekh Torah, which is primarily for interfaith couples and potential Jews-by-choice to learn more about Judaism. In one session, the instructor asked us to stand up and spread out in a line based on our belief in God. One end of the line was for those who believe 100% in the God of the Bible, the God who watches over your every move. The other end of the line was for anyone who was 100% sure there is no God. After finding our spots and looking around, it became quickly apparent that the Jews in the class were spread fairly evenly from one end to the other. The non-Jews in the class seemed amazed by this diversity of belief.

Most Christians who no longer believe in Jesus as messiah eventually stop calling themselves “Christian”. In the Jewish community, we simply create a new denomination that denies the centrality of God to Judaism (Secular Humanistic Judaism), and go on “wrestling with God” all the same. To me, it’s that “wrestling” - with God, with Torah, with Israel (the country and the Jewish people) - that is the essence of Judaism. How we express that essence is going to be different for each Jew, and I can only answer for myself. But I think that what comes out of that wrestling, in general, has been a boon not just for the Jewish people but for the world at large over the millennia.

My own personal answer for what it means to be Jewish leans liberal (just in case that wasn’t obvious from all my prior answers). Fighting for social justice and working to repair the world speaks to me. I also enjoy the intellectual grappling with the text through contemporary and innovative commentaries. You don’t have to be a religious Jew to find meaning for your own life within the tradition. For example, I love that Judaism requires a very specific percentage of your income to go to charity, and I try to use that as a personal benchmark. There are endless opportunities to draw from our tradition, regardless of where we fall on the spectrum of ritual practice or denomination. There is also the warmth of being part of a community - once you’re actually on the inside.

My primary expression of Jewish identity (based on hours-per-week) is in working for the Jewish community. Before coming to JOI, I was blessed to work in an organization presided by Rabbi Irving “Yitz” Greenberg, the “radical” modern-Orthodox thinker, and he taught me more than he could possibly imagine in our few brief interactions. His idea of Jews taking on a “voluntary covenant” in the wake of the Holocaust impacted on me greatly; it’s a wonderful example of a brilliant mind and devout Jew wrestling with God. Ultimately, though, most Jews are not volunteering to take up the full covenantal relationship with God at all. So I see it a little differently.

Today what we have is a “selective covenant,” where many Jews accept only those aspects that are meaningful and valuable to their lives. I know this is not the “right way” according to Orthodoxy, but it’s the reality for most of us in the non-Orthodox world.

If the work of outreach is to help others find for themselves what it means to be Jewish (or to be part of a Jewish household), let’s offer the full buffet of Jewish religious, cultural and communal offerings, with the understanding that people might select only one thing to begin, and that’s okay. If it enriches their lives, they’ll come back for second and third helpings. Soon they’ll be well on their own Jewish journey toward answering those big questions for themselves.

Thanks so much for having me as your guest.

Paul

Dear Mr. Golin,

It what ways do you think intermarried couples will be agents of change within the Jewish community - and what changes do you expect the community to go through because of the growing number of none-Jewish members in the community.

For example: will this change the way the American community communicates with the Israeli one (in which you can barely find none-Jews)?

Thank you

Noam

Hi Noam,

Excellent question. As I said earlier, it’s very difficult to attribute “cause” and “effect” specifically to intermarriage when there are so many larger trends impacting upon American Jewry. But one thing some people bemoan is a loss of Jewish “ethnicity” and may attribute that to high rates of intermarriage. Of course “ethnicity” means different things to different people but I think much of that loss (or change) was happening anyway and if intermarriage is contributing, it’s only serving to speed up the inevitable.

For example, it seems that every Jew who grew up in Brooklyn in the 1950s holds fond memories of spreading chicken fat (”shmaltz”) on bread and eating it as a sandwich. When they tell that to Jews in my generation and younger, we find it positively revolting. If shmaltz was ever an indicator of ethnic Judaism, it was doomed — with or without intermarriage. At the other extreme, bagels are so mainstream now, there’s nothing Jewish about eating one. Ethnic food alone was never going to keep us together as a people.

That said, I think a lot of folks use the phrase “ethnically Jewish” as a kind of shorthand for the entire Ashkenazi-American experience, and believe there’s a particular way to “look Jewish” or “act Jewish”. This has always been an incomplete picture because not all Jews trace their ancestry through the Pale of Settlement. But the feeling is real, and I won’t deny that I have “ethnic pride” about being Jewish. This ethnic identity may be particularly important to the many completely-secular Jews in America, and helps explain why some may feel upset when their children intermarry even though they themselves haven’t participated in any Jewish activities in years — because their grandchildren may not “look Jewish” like them and will have dual-ethnicities.

So one major trend that intermarriage is accelerating is that to “feel Jewish” in America, you actually have to DO something Jewish. And that’s one explanation behind the remarkable statistics from the recent study of intermarried families in Boston, which found that “intermarried parents raising their children as Jews are the most likely to believe strongly that being Jewish involves celebrating Jewish holidays (86 percent). This is higher than that reported by in-married [Reform and Conservative] families, where approximately 60 percent report similar results.”

In other words, intermarried families don’t have the luxury of “just being” Jewish. That’s also why intermarried families raising Jewish kids in Boston light Shabbat candles more often than their in-married Reform AND Conservative neighbors. That is a truly stunning finding. This suggests that Jews in those households are observing Shabbat more often because they intermarried than if they had in-married! And we at JOI see this play out all the time because we operate The Mothers Circle (www.TheMothersCircle.org), a program for women of other religious backgrounds raising Jewish children, and it’s clear that in most cases they are the driving forces of Judaism in their households, not their Jewish spouses.

Intermarriage pushes the American Jewish community to confront the big questions: what does it mean to be Jewish? How do we express our Judaism? Who is a Jew? It’s good to grapple with tough questions; that’s what Jews do. We will have a stronger community if we can provide compelling answers to those big questions.

Those same big questions are being confronted in Israel as well, even though you say you can barely find a non-Jew in the Israeli Jewish community. Who is a Jew in Israel? According to the government, not the thousands of patrilineal Russian immigrants who are eligible to die for their new country but not to be buried in Jewish cemeteries there. While Israel is not our focus at JOI, our friends at the Half-Jewish Network (www.half-jewish.net) and the Association for the Rights of Mixed Families (http://www.mixedfamilies.rustreet.com/english/index.php) have been advocating vocally for better treatment of the adult children of intermarriage by the religious authorities in Israel. I would also add that there are much larger challenges in the way the Israeli and American Jewish communities currently relate (or don’t), far beyond the issues of intermarriage.

Thanks,
Paul

Dear Mr. Golin,

Your comments regarding interfaith couples seem so positive that I wonder: don’t you see any downside or danger in this trend?

Thank you

Yaakov B.
Jerusalem

Hi Yaakov,

Great question! I have to be an optimist about the Jewish potential of intermarried families if I’m to do the work of outreach. There are three reasons why I do this work: (1) I have a personal connection to the issue, (2) I believe the Jewish community has a moral imperative to welcome people in rather than push people away, and (3) I’d like to help more people find value and meaning in the Jewish community. We can discuss “downsides” on all three levels.

On the personal level, if raising Jewish children is of primary concern, then it is generally easier for two Jewish parents to raise Jewish kids than for just one Jewish parent. The point of our advocacy is to show that while it’s more of a challenge for intermarried families, it’s not impossible; in fact, it happens a lot. We’d like to help it happen more.

On the communal level, the supposed downsides have been promulgated constantly for the past two decades. In the 1990s, certain opponents of outreach suggested that welcoming the intermarried would “dilute” Judaism. We don’t hear that anymore — perhaps because the Reform movement has demonstrated how to both embraced large numbers of intermarried households while also moving toward more Jewish ritual practice and observance than ever before.

Another supposed downside was that once we accept intermarriage as “normative,” it will encourage more young people to intermarry. This is like the argument that if we teach safe sex to teens it will encourage them to have sex! It’s a distortion of cause-and-effect. Teens have sex because they’re teens, and American Jews intermarry because they’re American. The recent Pew Study on religion in America shows that Jews are just like everybody else in that regard.

We should welcome the intermarried because it’s the right thing to do. If we excommunicated Jews for breaking halacha, there’d be nobody left, even among the 15% who actually aspire to keep all the mitzvot (commandments). And as for the non-Jewish spouses, they are the primary audience for us to practice “welcoming the stranger,” the mitzvah repeated most often in the Torah. If there’s a downside, it’s that we need to dedicate communal resources toward things like adult education and professional training. But the resources are there, they just haven’t been utilized wisely or widely enough. Because when they are, like the 1% of Boston Federation’s budget dedicated to outreach (the highest percent in the country), it seems to produce results.

Finally, there’s the demographic argument. Common wisdom suggests that intermarriage is contributing to a decline in the number of American Jews. While that may have been true in the past (and it’s debatable), our past does not dictate our future. The recent Boston community study was the first time we’ve seen in writing that intermarriage contributed to the growth of the Jewish community, because 60% raise their kids Jewish (and anything above 50% equals growth). While that should be our goal everywhere and not just Boston, I really don’t think it’s about the numbers at all. We’ve always been a tiny minority, yet we’ve survived. Size is not a good enough reason to reach out to newcomers; it’s about meaning and values.

The panic I sometimes hear from the Jewish community about our future simply doesn’t jibe with my experience of Jewish life in America today, and I don’t believe it’s helpful in attracting newcomers. Nobody wants to board a sinking ship — or a ship that the passengers think is sinking even if it’s not. That’s why I try to remain optimistic about the Jewish future rather than accept any downsides to outreach as permanent obstacles.

Thanks,
Paul

Dear Paul,

And how do you read the fact that most of these couples, while raising their children Jewish, also keep Christmas trees at home? Does this make them less Jewish, a new type of Jewish, just as Jewish - what does it mean?

Best

Rosner

Hi Shmuel,

First, let’s be upfront in agreeing that there’s nothing Jewish about a Christmas tree. At the same time, let’s also acknowledge that there’s nothing religiously Christian about it either. (In fact, my devoutly Christian friend refuses to have one because she considers it so pagan!) So I’m not sure how indicative it is of anything, in-and-of itself.

When you speak of those intermarried families raising Jewish children, many times the Christmas tree is a way of “helping daddy celebrate his holiday.” I think from a very young age, children can understand “I’m Jewish, mommy’s Jewish, daddy’s not Jewish.” There are many reasons why intermarried families that create Jewish households may still maintain this particular tradition — in some cases because the Jewish spouse enjoys it so much.

Can it sometimes cause confusion? Of course. I recently heard from one young woman who grew up in an interfaith home and now swears she will only date Jewish men because she wants to avoid the confusion she felt growing up. And yet here she is, a strongly identified Jew nonetheless. Others may have reactions that pull them away from Judaism.

But as with almost every question about intermarriage, what we’re really talking about are much larger issues. How can I be “less Jewish” than you? How are we measuring Jewishness in the first place? One of the most divisive statements in the Jewish world is “you’re not Jewish enough” - not between Orthodox and non-Orthodox, but within the non-Orthodox world.

If an intermarried family has a Christmas tree but belongs to a synagogue and is raising their children Jewish, are they “less Jewish” than an in-married family that forgoes their children’s Jewish education altogether?

These intermarried families are on a “Jewish journey,” just as we all are. Social psychologist Bethamie Horowitz’s groundbreaking work suggests that most Jews change their level of Jewish identity over time, and we have long known that most Jewish families come in and out of involvement with the organized Jewish community over time as well.

Is the Jewish community saying to these intermarried families: “Come as you are, because we have something great we want to share with you”? Or are we saying, “First lose the Christmas tree so you look more like us.” I’d point to Chabad as an example of the success the entire community can have with more of a “come as you are” attitude.

Thanks,
Paul

Dear Paul,

Two new studies found a correlation between Jewish officiation at weddings of interfaith couples, and the chances that these couples will be raising their children as Jewish. Three questions:

1. Do you understand why many rabbis still refrain from marrying interfaith couples?
2. Do you want it to change? And, do you see such change as a priority?

3. If so, how will you convince rabbis to change their minds?

Best

Rosner

Hi Shmuel,

It’s not just ‘many’ but most rabbis who won’t marry interfaith couples, and it’s fairly understandable why not. The overwhelming majority of rabbis live both their personal and professional lives according to halacha (Jewish law), and intermarriage breaks with Jewish law. I would no more ask an Orthodox rabbi to officiate at my intermarriage than I would ask him to dine with me at Red Lobster. The reasoning, however, gets more complicated as you move into the more liberal streams of Judaism where not all rabbis measure their actions solely by halacha.

At the Jewish Outreach Institute (JOI), we advocate for all rabbis to see themselves within a “Big Tent Judaism,” where there is still room for Jews who intermarry even if it may not be in their own particular corner of the tent. Therefore, we strongly recommend that rabbis who don’t officiate make personal referrals to rabbis who do. That to us is the highest priority.

What I found most fascinating about Arnold Dashefsky’s excellent “Intermarriage and Jewish Journeys” study was that, of couples who were rejected when asking a rabbi to officiate, 91% of Jewish spouses and 80% of non-Jewish spouses were “somewhat” or “very” upset, yet only 33% and 39% respectively felt that “the rabbi was not sensitive in explaining the reasoning for the refusal”. If I’m reading that correctly, it means more than half the couples got sensitive answers as to why the rabbi would not officiate yet still came away upset.

The policy recommendations for rabbis at the end of that report did not include “make referrals,” which I would bounce to the top of the list. If rabbis can start by providing the actual information the couple is looking for - a rabbi that will marry them - it turns a “no” into a “yes and”. Delivered with warmth, kindness, and perhaps an offer like a free year of synagogue membership to all newly-married couples, it may open a relationship with that couple even if the wedding is officiated by someone else.

It remains fairly difficult for couples to find rabbis who officiate at intermarriages, and in many communities there simply aren’t any. The new studies coming out may help change the minds of some rabbis - if their not officiating had been based on reasons other than halacha like “Jewish continuity” by strongly challenging the notion that all intermarriages are bad for the Jewish community.

Still, I doubt there will be an immediate sea change in the number of rabbis who officiate at intermarriages. Evaluating each couple by a set of criteria to determine if a Jewish home will emerge can become a lot more work than simply saying no to all of them. The Conservative movement won?t even allow rabbis to consider it, which is difficult for me as a layperson to understand when it seems that they do allow autonomy on whether or not to officiate at gay and lesbian commitment ceremonies. In the Reform movement, we estimate that only about a third of rabbis will officiate. Rabbis that change their minds seem to be in the field for many years, while those coming out of seminary (in all the movements) seem more to the right than their predecessors. Overall, this speaks to a challenge for the non-Orthodox community; we want our religious leaders to be more “religious” than us, yet we also want flexibility on issues like officiation.

To me, the big news from the recent crop of reports is the growing acceptance of a more nuanced view of intermarriage. Not all intermarriage is the same. Not all intermarriages lead to the end of Jewish continuity. Many intermarried families look a whole lot like in-married families. These are things we at JOI have been saying for the past two decades. Perhaps people need “the numbers” to really believe what they can simply see by looking around their own Seder tables: that there are as many if not more non-Jews “marrying in” as Jews “marrying out.” It may or may not change rabbis’ minds about officiation, but I hope it will allow us as a community to move forward in fully welcoming those intermarried families who would join us.

Thanks,
Paul

January 28, 2008

Moishe Smith

Author: rosnersdomain - Categories: Rosner's Guests - Tags: , , , ,

Moishe Smith of Ottawa, Canada, is the first non-U.S. citizen elected president of B’nai B’rith International. Smith has been active in B’nai B’rith - “an international Jewish organization committed to the security and continuity of the Jewish people and the State of Israel, defending human rights, combating anti-Semitism, bigotry and ignorance, and providing service to the community on the broadest principles of humanity” - for more than 30 years.

Smith has long focused on B’nai B’rith’s public policy arena and has developed expertise on a broad range of issues. He led B’nai B’rith Canada’s first-ever mission to the Soviet Union; served as Chair of the International Council of B’nai B’rith; Vice Chair of the Center for Human Rights and Public Policy; and for many years served as a member of the B’nai B’rith Delegation to the World Zionist Organization.

Before being named President of BBI, Smith completed two terms as Chairman of the Executive. He also served two consecutive two-year terms as a Senior International Vice President. Professionally, Smith is in the food and hospitality industry, with restaurants across Canada and headquarters in Ottawa. Smith also sits on the board of the Ottawa Food Bank, the Ottawa Tourism & Convention Association, the Ottawa Restaurant Association, and the Canada Israel Committee.

Readers can send questions to: rosnersdomain@haaretz.co.il.

Last one, also from a reader:

Please see that he gets it.

Dear Mr. Smith,

Do you see anti-Semitism in North America as a problem - or is it mostly something of the past (clearly, europe is another story).

Thank you,

Ravi Tal

Mr. Tal, thank you for raising this important issue.

We all see, on a regular basis, horrific examples of antisemitic in
Europe, indeed, in many parts of the world. North America is not immune
to this rising tide of hate.

We have seen a significant increase in anti-Israel rhetoric and
activities as of late. And, anti-Israel activities often turn
antisemitic.

College campuses are a case in point. Anti-Israel bias turned to
antisemitism at Concordia University in Canada. The recent speech by
Iranian President Ahmadinejad at Columbia University in New York also
fanned the flames of hate.

Did you know that February 3-9 is Israel Apartheid Week around the
world? Again, it’s only a short leap from anti-Israel sentiment to
antisemitism.

In communities around North America, Jewish cemeteries have been
desecrated, synagogues have been defaced, and antisemitic graffiti has
showered the streets. All are more common than they have been in
decades. These days, no part of the world is immune to antisemitism.

What are we doing about this? It is the goal of B’nai B’rith
International to use education programs, like Diverse Minds Youth
Writing Challenge and Enlighten America essay contests to teach tolerance to the next generation.

On college campuses, we are taking direct action through a joint program
with Alpha Epsilon Pi (AEPi), a historically Jewish fraternity; Kappa
Alpha Psi, a historically African-American fraternity; and B’nai B’rith.
A Black-Jewish Relations series of programs will be coming to a number
of U.S. campuses this spring to forge understanding, foster ongoing
relationships, and build on similarities rather than differences.

B’nai B’rith International continues to identify and undermine acts of
intolerance and antisemitism in North America and around the world. Our
work in support of tolerance and human rights continues at the
Organization of American States (OAS), the Organization for Security and
Cooperation in Europe (OSCE), the United Nations, and before the
Canadian and U.S. governments. Unfortunately, our work is far from
done.

Moishe

Another one, this time from a reader:

Dear Mr. Smith,

Excuse me for this question, but what exactly is the role of B’nai Brith today and why to we still need it? I have the impression that there are more Jewish organizations working for Jews than there are Jews. Aren’t abolishing organizations a part of this “new definition” we need for the Jewish world?

I know this might be a provocative question to ask you, and do not expect that you agree with me. But please, help me understand your point of view.

Thank you,

Gabriel Goold

Thank you Gabriel, for asking a truly important question. It’ll allow me
to talk about an organization that I’ve been deeply involved in for more
than 25 years. And to address the very real issue of the relevancy of
B’nai B’rith, 165 years after it was founded.

First off, B’nai B’rith has been a ground breaking humanitarian, human
rights, and advocacy organization since 1843. Jewish unity is just as
important today as when a group of German immigrants established B’nai
B’rith to help Jewish widows and orphans. Today, BBI’s reach extends to
more than 50 countries around the world. That’s no small feat. In some
places, the small Jewish community of Uruguay comes to mind, B’nai
B’rith serves as the link to the broader Jewish community, and also
provides an umbrella to shield and protect a small Jewish population.

Today, B’nai B’rith, as it has since its inception, fights against
antisemitism and anti-Israel bias. We do this on our own, through
educational programs, and within a broader coalition of Jewish groups.
Sometimes, teaming up with other Jewish organizations gives us a bigger
voice.

And that actually leads to your comment, “I have the impression that here are more Jewish organizations working for Jews than there are Jews.”

That’s an interesting way to see things. But what I see is a wonderful array of Jewish groups, each with its own unique and important mission. Sure we overlap on some topics, such as fighting antisemitism. But there are so many issues central not just to the Jewish community, but to the broader global community, that different Jewish groups specialize in.

Having a wide range of Jewish groups concentrating on a wide range of subjects ensures lots of Jewish voices get heard. There’s a home for every opinion. And this ensures the Jewish community stays vital in the world. I don’t think “abolishing” Jewish organizations, as you put it, would or should be a part of any plan that could help Jews the world over. We are a small community, constantly having to watch our backs. Yet thanks to the dedicated work of so many Jewish groups, we not only look after our most basic issue - our survival - but we can also focus on helping our own community and helping others.

So back to what we do and why it’s important. Another critical role we
fill is providing senior housing and advocacy on issues of concern to
seniors and their families. BBI is the largest national Jewish sponsor
of senior housing in the United States and operates nearly 50 fixed-income and market rate housing facilities worldwide. The United States government has even suggested our senior housing experts to foreign governments trying to deal with their own issues of senior housing.

We meet with law makers on a regular basis to ensure senior issues,
especially pertaining to healthcare, are front and center. BBI brings
programs and services to seniors and gives them the opportunity to take
control of their own futures.

Helping communities in crisis is an often overlooked, yet critical
resource we provide. B’nai B’rith has been engaged in disaster relief
since 1865. Our Disaster Relief Fund has provided aid to populations
affected by natural and man-made catastrophes around the world. Our
disaster relief is on a different scale and with a different focus than
that of organizations such as the Red Cross. Our focus is to help a
community get back on its feet, after immediate disaster relief groups
have tended to immediate needs of food and shelter, and have left. B’nai
B’rith continues to rebuild houses in New Orleans. We donated money to
synagogues and churches to help worshippers get back something important
to their spiritual needs. That’s an ongoing commitment we make to
communities. After the tsunami in Southeast Asia, we helped fund
business cooperatives so residents could learn a new trade, or have a
place to continue the line of work they already knew before the tsunami
hit. After the fall 2007 earthquake in Peru, we sent medical teams to
help people with ongoing medical issues.

In world affairs, B’nai B’rith has a big voice at the United Nations.
BBI has served as an NGO (non governmental organization) at the United
Nations since its inception. In fact, B’nai B’rith is the only Jewish
organization with an office dedicated exclusively to United Nations
affairs. We meet with ambassadors and world leaders and give a voice to
Jewish communities and concerns.

Our World Center in Jerusalem serves as our eyes and ears in Israel.
It’s the voice of the B’nai B’rith community to the Israeli government.
We provided books to Israel Defense Forces soldiers in 2006, so when
they had a small break from the war in Lebanon, they had a positive
distraction. This is one way we are making a difference in Israel.

But of course, this organization is only as strong its members and
supporters. The only way a group as old and established as B’nai B’rith
can continue to grow and thrive, and can continue to further the Jewish
cause, and pursue humanitarian issues and human rights, and stay
relevant, is to seek input and ideas from people - from both within and
outside our organization.

Gabriel, you demonstrated with your question how high the bar is for
B’nai B’rith and how important it is to hear from the community at
large. Thank you.

–Moishe

Dear Moishe,

And what will Israel have to do if it wants to play a role in this new partnership?

SR

Hi shmuel,

For such a partnership to work, Israel and the Diaspora both have
crucial roles to play.

The Diaspora must remain connected to Israel - the home for all Jews.
One way B’nai B’rith keeps open the dialogue between young people from
the U.S. and from Israel is through our Camp Passport program. Each of
the past five summers, Israeli children have attended one of two B’nai
B’rith summer camps, all expenses paid. The program allows Israeli
children between the ages of 10 and 16 who have been directly affected
by terrorism to recapture a bit of their childhood, while they learn
about American Jewish children, and in turn teach American kids about
life in Israel. Summer camp, a rite of passage for many American kids,
takes on an important context when Israeli children take part. The
program, heading into its sixth summer, enables American children and
Israeli children to learn about each other in a casual atmosphere.

Another wonderful partnership that we can talk about is the Birthright
program. Sending young Americans to Israel to see and feel first-hand
what Jews fight so hard for everyday is a brilliant program. But the two
weeks Americans spend there can’t be the end of it. Many young Jews come
back feeling very connected to Israel, but that quickly wanes. We must
capitalize on those feelings. We can encourage on-going discussion
groups with those who have visited Israel to keep their attachment
alive. And perhaps there can be a reverse Birthright — where Israeli
young people can visit other Jewish communities around the world to
learn how Jews outside of Israel celebrate their heritage and culture.

We can encourage modern-day pen-pals- through email, of course - where
young Israelis are paired with young Americans and they can learn about
day-to-day life in each other’s countries.

Of course the government of Israel must be engaged in the education
process as well for such a partnership to work. Perhaps some sections
could be added to the school curriculum to really show Israeli youth how
Diaspora Jews helped in the creation of Israel. Seeing that Jews around
the world marched to establish the Jewish state, raised money for
Israel’s defence, and sent people to visit - many of whom ended up
making aliyah, could be “news” to today’s young Israelis. Israeli youth
can learn how American candidates for high office seek out the Jewish
community as a vital support network.

I am fortunate that in my position as B’nai B’rith International
president, I get to travel throughout Israel and meet a wide range of
Israelis, from government leaders to victims of terror attacks. I have
learned from my trips that Israelis have a keen understanding of how
deeply American Jews are attached to the Holy Land.

Moishe

Dear Moishe,

Let’s expand this discussion by asking the following question:

It appears that the Jewish Diaspora, especially the younger generation, is moving away from Israel. Do you think there’s a need for a new definition of the relations between the communities - maybe a new covenant - and what should it be?

Best

Rosner

Shmuel, I’m glad you brought this issue up.

Attracting the next generation to all things Jewish is a problem for every Jewish organization and the Diaspora communities generally: Attachment to Holocaust remembrance, to synagogues, to Jewish philanthropy and indeed to Israel are all issues of concern.

I believe the next generation views Israel as a strong, vibrant country, yet they have no attachment to the pioneering enterprise that helped build Israel into the strong country that it is today. I also don?t think that young people have a good understanding of the obstacles Israelis face in their daily lives. That?s where the disconnect is.

The concepts of aliyah and Zionism are not as palatable for them as they were for my generation.

The Diaspora must remain connected to Israel ? the home for all Jews.

I think a new partnership is in order. We can do this by assisting constantly and consistently with those who want to make aliyah. We must also undertake an educational process that encourages the next generation to forge strong Diaspora communities.

We should aim to introduce cross-cultural partnerships on a large scale. This would inspire younger people to advocate on behalf of Israel — a concept that I would call modern Zionism.

Dear Moishe,

In a recent poll conducted by BBI, you’ve found that “there is strong consensus by the Israelis polled that the future of Jerusalem is an internal political issue and that Diaspora Jews should not have a role in decision-making about Jerusalem’s status. Fifty-six percent versus 40 percent of those polled believe Jews outside of Israel should not have a say in the future of Jerusalem.”

Do you agree with this position of the majority of Israelis? Do you see any role that Diaspora Jews should be playing in the discussion over the future of Jerusalem? What should it be?

Thank you,

Shmuel

Thank you for inviting me to participate in this conversation, Shmuel.
I appreciate the opportunity.

The B’nai B’rith International poll that you are referring to yielded some very thought-provoking results on a variety of topics, and I found the poll results very interesting.

On the particular question that you ask, I believe that the Jewish community in the Diaspora has been committed to a united Jerusalem for decades. While I respect the views of the citizens of Israel, Jerusalem is central to the being of every Jew, wherever they live.

Israel isn’t a country unlike any other. Israel as a country has
stakeholders, not only from within the country, but from outside the country - all over the world.

While the ultimate decision will be in the hands of the citizens of
Israel, we in the Diaspora not only want to express our opinion, we have a right and indeed a duty to have an opinion.

Moishe

Moishe,

I need a follow up on this one: everybody has the right to an opinion on any matter. The question, though, is whether you expect your opinion to have some impact on decisions made by the Israeli government.

If you - what impact, and how do you expect this to happen?

SR

A good follow-up question, Shmuel.

We hope Diaspora Jews have some impact on decisions, or at least on the thought-processes that Israeli Jews are using to make decisions about Israel and Jerusalem. Though Diaspora Jews of course don’t live in Israel, we support Israel, emotionally and financially. It’s the homeland of all Jews.

How this impact could happen could be through talking with Israelis, sharing our ideas, meeting with officials to share our ideas. Also perhaps, by holding information forums in the Diaspora communities, where Israeli government officials, Israeli citizens, and Diaspora Jewry all have an opportunity to exchange ideas, so that we all could understand one another’s opinions.

I am convinced that the citizens of Israel and the Jews of the Diaspora are on the same page when it comes to the future of Israel and Jerusalem.

The final decision is still in the hands of our brothers and sisters in
Israel. We just need to be part of the debate.

Moishe

August 7, 2007

Aaron Hamburger

Author: rosnersdomain - Categories: Rosner's Guests - Tags: , , , ,

Author Aaron Hamburger (his personal web site is here) was awarded the Rome Prize by the American Academy of Arts and Letters for his short story collection THE VIEW FROM STALIN’S HEAD.

His writing has appeared in Poets and Writers, Tin House, Details, Time Out New York, and the Forward, and won First Prize in the David J. Dornstein Contest for Young Jewish Writers. Currently he teaches creative writing at Columbia University. His latest book, a novel about an American Jewish family traveling to Jerusalem titled FAITH FOR BEGINNERS, recently came out in paperback.

We will discuss issues surrounding Jewish life in America and elsewhere. Readers can send questions to rosnersdomain@haaretz.co.il

Dear Mr. Rosner,

My question for Aaron, based on the following two statements:

“It seems to me that an honest expression of Jewish identity is to concern yourself with the religion itself, rather than the place where the religion made its first appearance so many centuries ago.”

With this, I wholeheartedly AGREE!!! However, there seems to be a hint of contradiction in the next statement.

“Israel is a fine place, but we as North American Jews should recognize that unless we intend to immigrate there, it is not our place.”

I say contradiction because the “religion itself” speaks to the gathering of all the Jews to this place. So my question to Mr. Hamburger is… If it is not now “your place”, do you believe that it will be one day? I mean, isn’t that why Bible believers support Israel from all over the world, whether Jewish or not?

Sincerely,

Virginia

I think we have to make a distinction here between the land promised to Abraham referred to in the Torah and the modern-day state of Israel, founded in 1948. (For one thing, I believe Abraham was promised a much larger country, extending to the Euphrates River, no?) I don’t believe that the religious kingdom of Israel we’re all supposed to return to someday as described in the Torah is equivalent to the parliamentary democratic state of Israel, a political entity carved out of the British Mandate by the United Nations. Do you think they are the same because they share a geographic location?

(Also, I guess I should confess here that I am one of those pesky liberal types who read Biblical notions of redemption and promised lands in a non-literal way.)

Mr Hamburger seems to have lost his perspective on the Jewish faith if he thinks the needs and fate of the Jewish Community of Mississippi is on equal footing with the needs and fate of the Jewish Community of Israel. The Jewish Community of Mississippi might lack the resources to provide as much of a vibrant Jewish life as NYC or LA, but they don’t have to worry about rockets, suicide terrorists or existential threats. Israel is a small, vulnerable sandlot whose only natural resource is Yiddishe Kups; it still needs lots of support before it can be a self-sustaining, secure Jewish homeland. Judaism starts with saving lives, all the rest is Commentary. Mr. Hamburger isn’t seeing the Judaism forest through the Commentary trees. Does he want to further clarify his naive remarks?

Alan Feinberg

In the main, I’m not sure where we are in disagreement. I do not say that Jews should not feel a connection to Israel or that they do not have a right to feel that it is politically imperative to support the state of Israel. Many of us do. In fact, I would encourage anyone who wants to support the State of Israel to go for it. (Specifically I recommend they send their donations to the New Israel Fund and help support the gay community center of Jerusalem, which is working to promote tolerance for the LGBT community in a region where such tolerance is scarce.) However, I do say that supporting Israel is not a religious obligation. While there are compelling reasons for Jews to support Israel, in my opinion it’s not correct to argue that Jews should feel religiously compelled to support Israel.

Your idea that supporting Israel is a religious obligation because it saves lives is a stretch, based on a conception of Israel that I wouldn’t describe as naive, though I would describe it as hopelessly out of date.

Hamburger wanted to try and respond to some other comments made in the talkback section.

This exercise has been an interesting one for me. I’m a fiction writer, not a politician or a journalist or a rabbi. And yet I’m asked to give my opinions on political and religious matters rather than literary ones.

Here’s some advice. If you don’t agree with my opinions, then form your own. I’m a writer of novels, which in the age of Paris Hilton does not count for very much. Is there really anything so very frightening about what I’ve written, other than my belief that all people are equal in the eyes of God, that showing love and kindness to all people is central not only to the Jewish faith but to basic human decency? Yes, that’s scary alright.

Perhaps the one phrase I’ve written that people have objected to the most is the idea that Israel is not “our” place, by which I do not mean that we as North American Jews have no right to go to Israel or immigrate there. North American Jews have every right to go to Israel and if they want to stay, God bless them. However, I feel that we as North American Jews are not Israeli Jews. (Apparently this is a shocking notion.) We have a unique cultural and national experience and Israelis have a unique cultural and national experience, and those experiences are not the same. An American Jew who goes to Israel to live would experience culture shock and vice versa. An American Jew who moves to Israel would have to assimilate and get used to a different set of cultural norms. (Wow, now that’s really an awful thing to say. Shame, shame) The idea that there are no differences between Jews of different nationalities is absurd, as is the idea that it is somehow heretical to mark those differences and claim that they are important and worth exploring. Understanding the differences between Israeli Jews and American Jews can only bring us closer. On the other hand, insisting on an illusion of idealized Jewish brotherhood (the proof of whose illusory nature is all too evident in some of the out-of-whack responses to my posts on this site) is divisive and in my view counter-productive.

Reading my recent article Where is the center of the Jewish people?, in which both his book and our dialogue are mentioned, Aaron wanted to add some comments.

Dear Rosner,

Thanks for this. I’m flattered by the attention to my novel. I agree
with some of the points you raise about how the current generation of American Jews feel less of a connection to Israel than the generation that came before them. I’m not sure that my generation’s “‘Jewish’ activity” boils down to surfing websites. I don’t know if this is a detail you think is true or if you’ve done research to find that it is
actually true.

There are a few things in your column that I think should be cleared
up. Your sentence “Hamburger himself evinced enough interest in
Israel to stay in the country a few weeks and then write a book set
there,” is misleading because it implies that my background on issues relating to Israel is that of a first-time novice. I have been to
Israel more than a dozen times in my life. My family and I rented a
house there one summer. I have cousins there. My brother married an Israeli woman and we visited her family several times as well. In
writing Faith for Beginners, however, I did not rely solely on my own
experience of Israel. I also did copious research and cited a few of
my sources in the back of my book.

I don’t know what you mean by “Hamburger has said in the past that he is interested only in Americans.” (Maybe it would help if you quoted my words directly.) However, if that statement were literally true, why would I write two books set outside of America, first in Prague, then in Israel? Yes, my focus is on America and Americans and the way we deal with the world in an age when American decisions have such profound ripple effects, but certainly not to the exclusion of all others. Anyway, isn’t it natural for me to focus on Americans since I am American myself?

One other clarification I’d like to make is that when I say Israel is
not “our place,” meaning the place of American Jews, I don’t mean that American Jews have no connection to Israel. Rather I mean that we do not own Israel. Israel is not a sub-colony of American Jews where we can simply appear, take up residence, and feel at home. Israel has developed a unique culture that we as Americans do not share. Some aspects of it we do share, but many others we do not. For example, I grew up in the land of suburban shopping malls and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, not the land of felafel stands and compulsory military service. I could turn this into a long compare and contrast exercise, but I’ll leave that for another time.

My question to you, however, is what is your hope for the relationship of American Jews and Israel? Do you want us to all fall into lockstep and robotically drone, “We feel very close to Israel. We feel very close to Israel.” Isn’t that a bit unnatural, even unreasonable, given that we don’t live in Israel, have spent the vast majority of our lives in America, speak English as our native tongue, have grown up being taught in school to pledge allegiance to an American flag, etc. Also, perhaps we need to differentiate between the state of Israel, a political entity created by the United Nations fifty-odd years ago, and the spiritual “Israel,” located not on a map but in the Torah. Or do you think that the State of Israel that issues passports and drivers licenses is the same thing as the land Jews yearn for every year at the end of the Pesach seder, when we sing “Next Year in Jerusalem”?

Thanks for the opportunity to be a part of this conversation!

Best,
Aaron

A final note, in the novel, it’s Jeremy, the younger character, who
ends up feeling an intense connection to Israel and even considers a
second visit, while Mrs. Michaelson, the older character, decides that
it leaves her cold and never wants to return.

Dear Mr. Rosner, This is a question for your guest, Mr. Hamburger. What does he mean when he says that an American Jew should “concern himself with the religion itself”? Does it mean he does not at all recognizes the “Jewish people”? And if he doesn’t what is it that makes one Jewish? Keeping Kosher, observing Shabbat, the High Holidays? What is the greater theme of being Jewish in his view? I know these are not one but many questions, but I’m sure he’ll get the idea.

Thank you for your time.

Howie Spiegel,

A reader from New York

Thanks for this question. I’m glad for the opportunity to clarify.

The reader asks: What is it that makes a person Jewish? It’s a great question, one that Jews have sought to understand for a long time now. For three possible answers, please see my first post, which describes three models of Jewish identity: American, European, and Israeli. My inclination is toward the European model, i.e. a Jew is someone who insists on defining him or herself as Jewish.

I don’t understand the part of the question that asks whether I recognize the Jewish people. My guess is what the reader wants to know is whether I think part of being Jewish means making a connection and building a community with other Jews. My answer is, that probably is a part of it. But just as there are Jews in Israel, there are also Jews in Mississippi. I don’t feel the need to sustain, visit, and support the Jews of Mississippi. It would be nice of me to do so, but I don’t see it as a religious obligation. True, Israel is not Mississippi. Israel has a much stronger economy, health care system, and cultural life. The state of Mississippi is probably in more need of our help (at least on a financial level) than the state of Israel.

When North American Jews support Israel, they may do so because of a deeply-felt philosophical or political conviction. But that’s not the question here. The question is, is supporting Israel a religious act?

There is no commandment in the Torah that Jews should travel to Israel or give money to the state of Israel or lobby their elected representatives to support the state of Israel. There is nothing wrong with doing any of these things, (and in fact, I have done them) but I don’t think doing them is at the heart of what Judaism ought to be about, at least as I understand Judaism. It is possible to be an exemplary Jew in North America and not lift a finger to help Israel, just as I believe it is possible for an Israeli to be an exemplary Jew and not lift a finger to help North American Jews.

How is this possible? When Hillel was asked to explain the Torah while standing on one leg, he didn’t say, “Go visit Israel and donate to the Jewish National Fund.” He also didn’t say “Light candles on Shabbes,”or “Perform the ritual of appearing in shul on Yom Kippur once a year.”According to the legend, he said, “Love your fellow man as you would yourself. The rest is commentary. Go and study.”

I can find my “fellow man” right here where I live, and there are plenty of them who need that kind of radical Hillelian love and charity. Some are Jewish and some are not, but I don’t think God would mind if I helped both.

Dear Aaron,

My first question will probably be a soft ball as far as you’re concerned. Based on your latest book, I’m sure this is something you have already thought about quite a lot: In your opinion, is Israel the canter of Jewish life (and the Jewish people) or just one center?

Best

Rosner

Define Jewish.

I’m reminded of a very sweet Gentile friend of mine from high school who once said to me, “I don’t get it. Is Jewish a race or a religion?”

We hear a lot of talk about “Israeli Arabs,” but do we ever hear about “Israeli Jews”? How does a Jew of Israeli citizenship define his or her Jewishness? I have not met many Israeli Jews who spent a lot of time wringing their hands over this question. Jews in Israel don’t have to “do” or “believe” or even “assert” anything to be Jewish because they simply “are” Jewish. Just being alive and surviving as individuals and as a nation makes them de facto Jewish. People who
hold Israeli passports would have to go out of their way to explain “oh, but I’m not Jewish,” because otherwise their Jewish identity is automatically assumed. Therefore, I believe Israel is indeed a center of Jewish life, if you define Judaism as an inherent characteristic that you’re born with. Religious life exists there of course, but from what I’ve seen, religious practices are a matter largely left to tourists or recent American immigrants to Israel who live in Jerusalem, that most un-Israeli (culturally, I mean) of cities.

To be Jewish in America, however, is focused much less on innate and immutable characteristics. Many Jewish Americans would be insulted to hear themselves called a “Jew” or to hear their identity referred to as a “race.” I think this is partially because we’ve been influenced by Christians, who define themselves not by bloodlines, but by their relationship to their faith. For an American Jew, the question isn’t so much about how many of your ancestors had Jewish mothers (though that is a part of it), but rather such questions as “What synagogue do you go to?”, “Do you keep kosher?”, “Do you observe such and such a holiday?” However, these highly common markers of belief are actually not belief-based, but rather ritual or action-based. If to be Jewish in Israel is what you “are,” to be Jewish in America is a function of what you “do.” (Whereas to be Christian in America is a function of what you “believe.”)

For a long while it was widely assumed that after World War II there were only two poles of Jewish life and culture: Israel and America. However, with the recent survival and even resurgence of Jewish life in Europe, as well as the widening gap between political and cultural life in Europe and in America, European Jewry is making a comeback and asserting a distinctly non-American and non-Israeli notion of what it means to be Jewish. These communities are populated not only by those whom we might traditionally define as Jewish, but also Russian immigrants with faint notions of what it is to be Jewish as well as people of partial Jewish ancestry who want to explore being Jewish.

The concept of Jewish identity has necessarily had to expand to include these people, for whom being Jewish is less about what you “are” or “do” but how you define yourself. In other words, to be Jewish in Europe is to say “I’m Jewish.” Though what it means to say you’re Jewish has yet to be defined. Is it eating challah on Friday nights or going to synagogue or having an Orthodox conversion?

These matters have inspired considerable ongoing debate.

Therefore, I think there are three centers of Jewish life and thought, each with competing identity models. Together they present interesting alternatives for us to choose from as we contemplate the survival of Judaism for the future.

Best,
Aaron

Dear Aaron,

Here’s the more difficult question: What is, or should be, the role of Israel in the lives of North American Jews?

Rosner

I don’t think Israel necessarily has any role that it “should” play in the
lives of North American Jews. Israel is Israel, North America is North
America. Israel is not a province or colony or tropical vacation
retreat for North American Jews who send money to sustain its existence, though that confusion does I think exist in the minds of many North American Jewish tourists who go there. Israel is not a Bible Theme Park. It’s not a place for Jewish teenagers to go wild and let their hair down in the summertime, though again, I know that happens.

Most importantly, Israel is not a pillar of our religious belief, though Israel as well as the Holocaust has served as ways to bind young Jews to the Jewish faith, now that we live in a post-religious age when people are less likely to be bound to the principles of the faith itself. Studying Torah and keeping Shabbat may be a drag, for
example, but sunning yourself on a Tel Aviv beach or going on a Teen Trip to Israel is not only fun but also only lasts a few weeks,
whereas the nettlesome burdens of religion and faith last a lifetime.

It seems to me that an honest expression of Jewish identity is to concern yourself with the religion itself rather than the place where the religion made its first appearance so many centuries ago. Israel is a fine place, but we as North American Jews should recognize that unless we intend to immigrate there, it is not our place. It’s the Israelis’ place with a unique history and local culture that we don’t share, no matter how much money we’ve raised or how many times we’ve gone to visit. Certainly we feel some kinship with Israel, and in fact many of us have family there. If we as individuals want to develop that relationship, fine. But I believe that is a choice each of us makes on our own and not a “should” or a “must” for all of us.

Best,
Aaron

May 27, 2007

Michelle Cove

Author: rosnersdomain - Categories: Rosner's Guests - Tags: , , , , ,

Michelle Cove is the Editor of 614, the Hadassah-Brandeis Institute webzine for Jewish women that “offers an opportunity to explore what Jewish experts, authors and scholars are discussing around the world.” She has been writing and editing for national magazines and websites for over 15 years, including her positions as Editor-in-Chief of JVibe (the national magazine for Jewish teens), Senior Editor for Girls’ Life, and Senior Editor of Mother Earth News.
In 2006, Cove started a blog for Jewish Women’s Archive called Jewesses with Attitude, geared to 20- and 30-something Jewish women. In 1999, Michelle co-authored the national bestseller I’m Not Mad, I Just Hate You!: A new understanding of mother-daughter conflict.
We will discuss issues related to young Jews and their parents. Readers can send questions to rosnersdomain@haaretz.co.il.

Dear Michelle,

These will be the last two questions. Both came from readers and both are challenging enough to nearly overwhelm you.

1. Building on your experience with the younger generation of American Jews, can you please try to give us your best assessment as to what American Judaism will look like in 20-30 years?

I wish I had a brilliant prediction for you. I don’t. I only know that having spent a lot of time talking with secular Jewish youth in the past few years, I heard a lot of the same thoughts over and over across the country. Mainly, I heard them say that while they don’t feel very religious, they do take pride in their Jewish identity and want to learn more about Judaism in ways that are appealing to them. This was true even of Jewish kids whose parents were totally removed from all religious life. Many said they also want to learn about other religions and understand how non-Jews think and believe. In general, they said they like hanging out with other young Jews and feel connected with them in a way that’s different than with their other friends. How do their viewpoints play out in 20 to 30 years? We’ll see.

2. You took the time to point out that you refrained from revealing your feelings (or views) about intermarriage in your reply to a previous question. Can I ask for it now? and if you’re not going to divulge your feelings, can you explain why?

I can tell you how I feel when it comes to myself and what I’d want for my child. I think it’s really challenging to find someone who you want to spend your life with. It’s easy to find someone who you like watching movies with and dining out with, and someone who you makes you laugh. It’s another thing to find someone who will be a really strong partner for life, someone who will be by your side when you feel like you’re falling apart, who is proud of your achievements even if they are going through a tough time, who wakes up to takes care of the baby at 3 a.m., who makes you a better person just for the knowing them. The person whom I found that with is Jewish, and I am happy about that. But if he wasn’t, I’d still choose him, religious conflicts or not. I want my daughter to find someone who will also make her life better, and I hope he is Jewish. And if he is not, then he will be fully accepted and embraced anyway.

I have to say about the interfaith issue that looking through all the comments posted below, it’s somewhat disheartening. We Jews are less than one percent of the people, and it’s just depressing to see how fractured and aggressive we can be with one another. I’m sure some people will attack the fact that I will support my daughter whether or not she marries Jewish, assuming she marries at all. That’s fine. I’m all for sparking conversation, that’s what I enjoy most in my line of work. But it’s one thing to thing to discuss and ask questions and try to learn from one another. It’s another thing to simply tear other people down. With hopes that I don’t sound preachy, I think we have a lot to learn from the teens mentioned above who are curious about understanding other cultures without feeling threatened.

Dear Ms. Cove,

I have enjoyed and admired your interview thus far. This question maybe going a little off track.

Our 19-year-old daughter seemed to be fine but lately she has been acting out in the worst possible ways. She has said she wants tobecome a rabbi but her behavior lately indicates otherwise as she shows no interest in her Judaism or Jewish values. She and I are constantly fighting and my husband doesn’t want to get involved in
“whatever weird dynamic is going on between the two of you.” I am hoping this is a phase that will pass as we all mature, but until then is there anything I can do to survive and still have a relationship with my daughter when it is over?

Thanks for your help,

Karen

Thanks, Karen.

Mother-daughter relationships tend to be so intense and complicated. I already feel that my two-year-old daughter both loves and hates me more than anyone in the world. It’s safe for our daughters to take out their angst and frustration on us (whether it’s a two-year-old who wants to
wear the pink dress or a 19-year-old who isn’t sure what she wants to do at a time when she’s being asked to figure it out). It’s safe because they know we love them no matter what. Your daughter will absolutely find her way. The best thing you can do is keep telling her that you
know she will do so and that you love her. It’s easy to lock horns when they spit out fightin’ words, but it’s much better for both of you if you can say, “This is clearly a frustrating time for you but I really know you are going to work this out. I am so confident about that.” Evenif she looks miserable, those words will sink in and be appreciated. And just keep breathing.

Dear Ms. Cove,

What can I tell my son when he says that going to shul is not cool? He already had his Bar Mitzvah and I have no means of convincing him.

Thank you for your advice.

Rebecca.

I just don’t think you’re going to be able to convince him - and the more you force it, the more he’s going to turn his back on it. For what it’s worth, I can tell you that I felt that way as a teen, as did most of my friends. We all had lousy experiences at Hebrew school and dropped out of the Jewish community as soon as we had our bar/bat mitzvah. I came back in my early 30s when I was ready to start learning again, and wanted to help other young Jews find better and more positive ways to learn about the religion. I think a lot more synagogues are “getting it” today in terms of figuring out how to make Jewish life more appealing to youth, but we still have a looong way to go.

Dear Shmuel Rosner,

I would like to ask Michelle Cove why at all she thinks it’s important to brain-wash our kids’ minds. Let them marry whomever they happen to love!

Robert Alter

Dear Robert:

Hmmm, “brainwashing” is maybe a little strong given that I didn’t even offer my opinion on interfaith marriages. My very point is that parents can’t and shouldn’t try to brainwash their teen because it’s unhealthy for the teen’s development and counterproductive.

Dear Ms. Cove,

Why is it that boys find it so much more difficult to connect with their Judaic heritage?

Thank you.

Agi Bendavid

You should check out the latest issue of 614, which revolves around the theme “Is Judaism a Girl Thing”? I’m not just offering a shameless plug here. The issue offers various perspectives on your question - including the big recent question about whether there is a Jewish “boy crisis” going on.

Dear Michelle,

Let’s make life somewhat more dificult for you by using specific examples. The most obvious: what to you say about intermarriage? Do you try to convince the Jewish youngsters to marry-in, do you leave it to them?

Using your method of “connecting them to topics they are already thinking about” one might wonder: how can one square the conflicting messages of pluralism and particularism?

Best,
Rosner

First of all, you’re right. Many kids today see the idea of interfaith as cool. They’re being exposed all the time through pop culture - in MTV videos, print and TV ads for their iPod, etc. - that it’s beautiful to look at all of us in the world as the same. If we open our hearts and minds, we can end up with someone once considered “different.”

If you take that further, the dream is that we can truly be without prejudice because we’ll all marry one another, have babies, and be genetically linked into one group of people. So parents who do want their kids to be proud of their unique religion and culture have a tough obstacle.

What can parents against interfaith marriage do? They can continue to expose their kids to Jewish summer camps, youth groups, to pop culture picks that encourage Jewish pride, to exposing them to Jewish role models. I can say from working with teens that it’s a big mistake to try to “convince” them to believe exacly what you believe.

There are several years before kids hit their teens where they really want to please the parents. But then as teens, it’s their job to push back and say “I want space to figure out my beliefs for myself.” This is obviously pretty terrifying for parents. But it’s important to note that teens may tell you they disagree even if they are perfectly in accord with your beliefs.

They may change their minds a half dozen times in a week. They are testing out - under the safety net of loving parents - what it feels like to be a separate person with their own set of values. That’s really healthy, even if it feels, well, crappy. And there’s the reality side: it just doesn’t work to say “this is what you believe” to a teen. It’s a lot like trying to tell how a cat how you’d like it to act.

Dear Michelle,

So how does one makes Judaism “engaging and relevant to young Jews”? And let’s start not with a detailed plan but rather with the principles: What is it that people should be looking for if they want to engage children and make them Jewish-conscious?

Best

Rosner

First of all, you don’t do it by guilting them into it, as in “you owe it to the people.” See, you got me fired up!

You teach Judaism and Jewish values by connecting them to topics they are already thinking about. It’s hard for kids/teens to relate to stories that happened thousands of years ago, unless you find a way to make it contemporary. Say you’re talking to kids/teens about Tz’ni’ut, or modesty, and you tell them that it’s important - They’re going to roll their eyes at you. They don’t want to be talked down to and are likely to believe you have no idea what it’s like today. But if you ask them how they feel when they see really young celebrities wearing skimpy clothing and open up a discussion, you introduce a Jewish value in a way they can connect to. What’s so amazing about Judaism is that all these ancient values are still so totally applicable and helpful. If you show young Jews how helpful these values can be when making tough decisions, you give them a gift they can keep relying upon. What better way to engage them?

Dear Michelle,

Your short comment presenting the third issue of “614″ reminded me how tricky it must be for a woman to be a feminist.

Women are now the majority in most Jewish (non-Orthodox) institutions and in many of them they assume the leading roles. Presumably, the revolution was a huge success. But you don’t seem to be happy about it.

“As Jewish women,” you write, “should we be enjoying this power to make decisions after so many years of exclusion, or figuring out ways to bring men back into the fold?”

So, should you?

Best

Rosner

Well, I have to start by saying how much I liked having the different perspectives in this issue. It riled up a bunch of readers, but the whole point of 614 is to “spark conversation” so they’ll think and talk through each issue.
That said, for me the whole idea of feminism is equality. It’s not take over and “win the revolution”; it’s to make sure that we all have an equal say in how things are set up from the get go and then maintained or, if need be, changed. That certainly holds true, I think, in how decisions are to be made in the Jewish community.
On a pragmatic note, the Jewish community obviously needs to engage all Jews. According to the last National Jewish Population Survey in 2000, the average number of kids that Jews are having today is 1.7, not enough to replenish us as a people. So it makes no sense to exclude an entire sex from participating in the discussion and decision making. It’s crucial that we work with one another to figure out how to make Judaism engaging and relevant to young Jews because we know so many are fleeing. That’s what I’ve been focusing on for the last several years.

May 14, 2007

Leon Botstein

Author: rosnersdomain - Categories: Rosner's Guests - Tags: , , ,

The president of Bard College and a renowned conductor, Leon Botstein will discuss matters related to Jewish life in America. As usual, readers are invited to send in their own questions.

An innovative voice in American higher education, Leon Botstein has been the president of Bard College since 1975. The author of Jefferson’s Children: Education and the Promise of American Culture, he has published widely in the fields of music, education, and history and culture.

Botstein is also a renowned conductor who has served as the music director and conductor of the American Symphony Orchestra since 1992. In 2003 he became the music director of the Jerusalem Symphony Orchestra, the radio orchestra of Israel. He has received the Award for Distinguished Service to the Arts from the American Academy of Arts and Letters and Harvard University’s Centennial Award.

We will discuss issues related to Jewish life in America. Readers can send questions to rosnersdomain@haaretz.co.il.

Although it is frequently said that America and Israel “share values,” I find this to be, in large part, empty rhetoric on the basic question of Israel’s relationship with its own Arab citizens as well as with the Palestinians. My understanding of American values means that I respect civil rights and the rule of law, including international law: this is altogether consistent with my Jewish anchor in social justice, but clashes irremediably with Israel’s policies, which have thus placed themselves outside of my identity as a Jew. Indeed, can you tell me why young American Jews, who take their obligation to pursue justice, should be involved with Israel at all except as advocates for Palestinian rights?

Miriam M. Reik

Miriam Reik’s response points to the need for as non-divisive a way as possible for discussing and moving forward on the issues she brought up. The “shared values” between America and Israel amount to more than rhetoric. They are about basic political premises including the obligation to see that justice and freedom are realized. Despite the complexities of history - how these premises were realized only in part - the basic claims of democracy cannot be dismissed easily. The Declaration of Independence and the Constitution were at one and the same time powerful instruments of change and also “empty” when those documents came into being, particularly for those who were in slavery, for women, and, for that matter, those without property. The United States hardly has an unblemished record past and present when it comes to social justice and civil liberties. One does not take pleasure in revisiting this country?s treatment of the Native American population or people of color down to this day. And we have our recent failings in our criminal justice system, including Guantanamo Bay. This history of imperfection is not justifiable in terms of ethics, but it can be understood as an aspect of politics and history. Moving from the present moment to the next and changing practice is what we ordinarily call progress. To achieve that progress is what citizenship in a democracy seems to render possible. So as an American, one faces high ideals with pride but also compromised realities, past and present. The present ones demand change. But a little humility as we seek to rectify injustices can be helpful in the process of nonviolent change.

Looking at the situation in Israel, the same can be said to apply. There is, as the writer suggests, a persistent problem of discrimination within Israel toward its own Arab citizens. There is also the problem of Israel?s relationship as an occupier of lands and people that will, I hope, form a viable autonomous Palestinian state. But the injustices that need to be contested and fought are the result of political failures and historical circumstances. There is responsibility and fault on all sides. One doesn?t want to simplify history, but it remains indisputable that Israel came into existence with broad international support. None of its neighbors, however, reconciled themselves to its existence. The idea of a Jewish state was itself a consequence of the late nineteenth century and twentieth-century European politics of national identity and anti-Semitism. The notion of the Jewish homeland and state in Palestine had the endorsement of the European powers. Comparisons do not justify, but when it comes even to the shift in populations during war and immediately following war no one today seriously considers reversing what Stalin achieved without international resistance in Europe during the same decade that witnessed the creation of Israel. Does anyone seriously consider returning people and land in what was once Germany to Germany, and what was once Poland to Poland, or restoring the Germans who were expelled from what is now the Czech Republic and their properties? Our moral compass regarding what is tolerable may have changed, but the consequences of history are not always available for redress.

One needs to move forward in a democratic Israel, just as American Jews in America who share the writer?s politics ought to feel obligated to work using American democracy to advance the causes the writer endorses. That same obligation applies to the citizenry of Israel. Israel is a democracy. There are many Israeli institutions and organizations that are hard at work doing precisely what the writer thinks ought to be done. My point of view is that American Jews can back those causes in Israel that parallel their own fundamental convictions. The tolerance with respect to the ethical imperfections in current practices in America should be extended to Israel. Neither nation is perfect. We should not hold Israel to a higher standard than we apply to other nations or ourselves. The writer believes that American values mean a respect for civil rights and the rule of law and international law. She also believes those are anchored in a specifically Jewish commitment to social justice. I share this point of view, but I then turn a critical eye to the extent to which our society and government really honor civil rights, the rule of law, and international law. We have a long way to go before we make an invidious comparison between Israel and ourselves. By saying that, I do seek to excuse or rationalize the injustices that take place here and in Israel.

But the improvement there involves a complex multi-national, reciprocal process that includes Israel’s neighbors, the Palestinians and the Arab world as well as the international community. Only in a context of security and peace can real progress toward tolerance, civil rights, and the rule of law be achieved. We Americans, September 11 notwithstanding, have enjoyed by any reasonable comparative standard the benefits of security, prosperity and peace, and we still have a long task ahead to realize a nation where the rule of law and social justice prevail without discrimination. So from my point of view, the standards by which we judge Israel ought to parallel those we apply to the United States. Those of us who are Jewish do not agree with each other or speak in one voice, and there is no parallel agreement in Israel either. But the disagreements within the majority in Israel, perhaps more than here, are less about ultimate ends than about strategy. The task in both countries is to work to make democratic ideals realities. Accepting that challenge will inevitably require a willingness to accept change and live with imperfection and compromise, and a capacity to resist demonizing opponents and those who do not remind us of ourselves. These habits seem in short supply both here and there.

Dear President Botstein,

Both the Jewish and the Arab population of Israel/Palestine appear to suffer from PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder). My 17-year old Israeli niece has already been through a number of wars, experienced being in an anti-gas plastic tent as a baby, in a gas mask as a 12-year-old, and has to listen to endless TV discussions of the Iranian threat. All nine of her great-aunts and uncles perished in the Holocaust. I can’t imagine what any 15-year-old Palestinian girl in Gaza has gone through.

It does not look like life in the Middle East will become any better in the foreseeable future. Ha’aretz reported that 11 percent of the 2007 IDF pool of male recruits did not join the army because they are Haredi. This percentage will grow to 23% by 2020. Meanwhile Hamas became the truly representative force within the Palestinian community. In the Middle East they turned the one G-d into two monster-gods battling each other.

Do we, the American Jews, have to consider an alternative to Zionism? Does the possibility still exist now where 10,000,000 Jews and Arabs can live intertwined between the river and the sea?

Respectfully,

Judy Hirsch

The question is a sensitive one. However, I think two issues are being confused. The first deals with what is undeniably the consequence of war, conflict, and violence. In all conflicts, the combatants are the young. Older people send younger people to fight for them. In Israel it is a little bit different, because at least there is the healthy reality of a citizen army with a universal service requirement that goes beyond the traditional age of military service. Nonetheless, an extraordinary toll is extracted from everyone involved. That?s the first issue.

When we come to the second issue?the political solution with the best chance of ending the pattern of conflict and trauma?there is a legitimate difference of opinion. I do not believe that what you are proposing, which is often described as a one-state solution, is promising. One reason concerns the history of Arab?Jewish conflict pre-1948. The second reason is that the point of Zionism is not the arrogant celebration of Jewishness but the rectification of a serious historical tragedy. Until the creation of the State of Israel, Jews were pariahs, people without full and equal political rights. Zionism was designed to create a democratic state in which Jews were the majority.

The same opportunity must be given to the Palestinians. Therefore, in my opinion, the right solution is what is called a two-state solution. To make this two-state solution put an end to the ongoing conflict, a viable Palestinian state has to be put into place that can succeed in economic and political terms. Second, Israel itself must write the final chapter in its own history as a democratic country, reform its electoral system insofar as it is necessary to do so, and draw a clear and unambiguous line separating religion and state. In my opinion, the future will be promising if Israel takes the final steps toward being a secular modern democracy in which religion becomes a private matter and in which equality of citizenship is given to all, even though the majority of citizens are and should be Jewish, just as the majority of citizens in Mexico are Mexicans, those in France French, those in Germany German.

In a world where nationalism and national identity still hold sway, the Jewish nation should have a state where it is not a minority. The world doesn?t seem to be wildly opposed to the effort by the Estonians to suppress the Russian language and discriminate against the huge numbers of ethnic Russians in Estonia. The world seems to tolerate the Estonian desire to have a country in which they are the majority and in which their language reigns supreme. So long as we live in world in which these claims are considered legitimate I support the notion of a democratic state in which Jews are secure in the majority, not by discrimination but by the constructive evolution of their state.

No doubt in the long run we would all be happier if we lived in a world in which we could be ourselves, different and distinct, and not fear discrimination through politics, a world beyond the nation state governed by a peaceful and rational international order where boundaries no longer make a difference. But now we are talking about dreams, utopias, and fantasies. But such things inspire behavior in a constructive way, and I believe the right step forward rests in a two-state solution.

Dear Mr. Botstein,

As a man of culture don’t you think that American Jewry are in desperate need of a new cultural framework for their Judaism? If they will no longer define themselves as secondary to the Jews of Israel - that is, to be Jews that didn’t yet make aliya, or just too spoiled to do so - what is it that makes them a community and an entity in its own right?

Thank you,

Mali Shapiro

In answer to the question and comment from Mali Shapiro, I first should say that I have not thought of American Jews as somehow ?secondary? to Israelis as Jews. In general, I am allergic to hierarchies of identity that suggest that one group is somehow superior, or more essential and legitimate (e.g. more French, American, Russian and the like).

Those who believe that Jews in Israel have a cultural priority implicitly define Jewish history since the first century BCE as possessed of diasporas that proved always to be temporary, and therefore directed toward only one true destination and home. The modern Jewish state then becomes the single stable end point of Jewish history. While much of history has proven the diaspora as ultimately unstable and even fatal to Jews, I believe that a pluralistic, secular democracy, with guarantees of freedom and in which equality of citizenship is obtainable by a process and not only by the circumstances of birth, similar to the one here in America, can be a permanent and vibrant home for Jews. Israel and America offer two long-term solutions to anti-Semitism and the marginalization of the Jew in political terms. They are, however, different, and consequently the culture of being Jewish?beyond the practice of religion will be distinct in each environment.

The cultural framework here is suggested by the benefits of democracy particularly in terms of the extent to which democracy limits the power of the majority. Essential to the culture of democracy where Jews can thrive as Jews is the premise that the principles of justice, freedom, and right are not subject to the will of the majority. The Bill of Rights and the judicial system, in combination with a constitution that makes religion a private matter, are designed to protect individuals from the crowd, and minorities from the tyranny of the majority and public opinion. As a distinct minority, the American Jewish community can choose to stand for values in life that are not measured by the marketplace, money, or profit, such as learning, the pursuit of science, and the arts.

A commitment to study, debate, dissent, and public service, informed by a vast and distinct intellectual and spiritual tradition can lead to Jews as citizens making welcome contributions to the majority culture, helping define in a dynamic manner, the character of American national identity.

A case in point has been the contribution American Jews have made to the modern secular character of America in the 20th century through popular culture, notably music and films. Therefore the ?cultural framework? that is needed is actually not new. It is an old one: the dynamic requirement to maintain and extend freedom, participation, and dissent in a democracy. We cannot afford to fail in pursuing this old-fashioned path of civic responsibility and virtue.

Dear President Botstein,

This one is from one of our readers:

When speaking with American Jews, one gets the impression that in
their eyes Israel is a Jewish community in need of support. In your
message, you too speak in terms of “support” and the debate
surrounding it. However, the conflict is not the only issue of our
lives - and many American Jews simply do not understand the cultural message of Israel. I imagine the reason for this is the poor Hebrew educational achievements in America. Generally American Jews cannot understand what Israel is offering the Diaspora communities in terms of creativity and cultural identity based on our own distinct language. Is there any hope that Israel’s Hebrew culture could be placed on the agenda of American Jewry, replacing to some extent the focus on Israel’s political-military woes?

Before responding to the question Mr. Rosner forwarded to me on this third day, I would like readers to know that this is my first (and probably last) venture into this form of Internet communication. I would not have done it had I not been invited. I never presented myself as an expert on these matters, just as a citizen. Why the responses are so often nasty or sarcastic baffles me. I have found that empathy, civility, and kindness in tone in the face of dissent and disagreement will do just fine.

Someone wrote questioning (or rather challenging) my “Jewish” credentials. The question is frightening in its amnesia and disregard of history. Nonetheless, it deserves an answer, but not the one it seeks. These are my “credentials.” Like many of my immediate family members (two uncles, one grandmother), had I (myself a postwar immigrant “as a small child” from Europe) been alive between 1939 and 1945 I too might easily have lost my life in the Holocaust. Like the three survivors (one uncle, grandmother, and grandfather), I might as well have been lucky and survived, in the Warsaw Ghetto, in hiding and in camp. I would have qualified for extermination under Nazi law and therefore qualify under the law of return. Like my parents, I am a long-standing dues-paying member of a synagogue. Although an agnostic in matters of religious faith, I belong to the congregation of the Conservative Synagogue in Kingston, New York, and am therefore listed and counted in all surveys and census reports as a Jew. Furthermore, I am in my fourth season as music director of a major historic Israeli cultural institution, the radio orchestra of Israel, the Jerusalem Symphony, which will celebrate its 70th birthday next year. And I have written, both in German and in English, on the history and culture of Jews in Central Europe in the nineteenth and twentieth centuries.

The question sent to me by Mr. Rosner is a good one, and the answer is not simple. The reason the issues of security and peace predominate is because their importance to American Jewry is political, historical, and symbolic. To American Jews, Israel is the “Jewish state” and reflects the only other viable place for Jews to live as full citizens in the world outside of the United States. But the underpinnings of that conviction have changed over time. In generational terms, the early- to mid-twentieth-century European Jews who went to Palestine and, later, Israel between 1880 and 1950 were quite comparable to their Jewish contemporaries who either remained in Europe or emigrated to the United States or South America. In succeeding generations, notably my generation that came of age in the 1950s and 1960s, there was still a strong familial resemblance between Israelis and the postwar generation of American Jews. This was in America the generation for whom Hebrew after-school education was often ineffective.

In my opinion, the situation is much different now. Today there is, as the question posted suggests, a distinct Israeli culture and an Israeli nation whose origins and character are not strictly or even predominately European. And over the same period of time American Jews have followed their own paths in the American diaspora. The twenty-year-old Israeli has less in common with his or her twenty-year-old American Jewish contemporary than would have been the case 25 or 50 years ago. This is what I presume Birthright is trying to address. But the cultural, linguistic, and experiential gap continues to widen as Israel evolves with its distinctive culture, much of it centered on the modern Hebrew language. American Jews are American Jews, and Israelis are Israelis.

I am skeptical that there can be any widespread increase in Hebrew fluency among the vast majority of American Jews. By and large, middle-class Americans are not very good at acquiring languages other than English, and Hebrew remains an unlikely candidate for widespread success. But I’m not sure that everything has to hinge on language. In the American Jewish community, the premise of common identity between Israelis and American Jews as Jews is crucial to maintaining the sense of solidarity. That premise drives political support. People want to see what they’re looking for, so even American Jews who travel to Israel are likely to gravitate to those things that remind them of continuities, not discontinuities. This seems to be problematic since one of the achievements of Israel can be found in the novel, rich, and complex culture that now nearly sixty years of political independence have helped nurture.

Last but not least, the consistent attention to the political circumstances is not unwarranted. Didn’t David Grossman recently write in The New York Times of a state of permanent insecurity? Particularly now, more and more American Jews have become aware that the situation has to be improved, if not resolved, that Israel is rapidly losing international support and sympathy, and risks finding itself veering toward pariah status, especially in the eyes of young people (under thirty!) throughout the world. Israel needs to get out of its status and image as an occupier. It needs to strengthen its vibrant and admirable democratic institutions and character. The last war has shown that more than military prowess is required for a peaceful future. I have no standing or expertise concerning how this might be done, and there is no doubt that the situation is not simple or easy. Young American Jews fear the international isolation of Israel. They fear the ease with which the honorable criticism of the policies of any Israeli government can be distorted into or deteriorate into an effort to delegitimate Israel’s existence or turns into thinly veiled anti-Semitism. But the obsession with the foreign policy issues reflects the desire, quite widespread among American Jews, to see a two-state solution come into being that is secure, just, and the basis of the kind of peace that many in the 1990s hoped would come into being in the not too distant future.

Dear President,

But if connecting to “American political and cultural issues” is
what is important, why do it through Jewish institutions? And what is
it that will make these institutions Jewish if all they deal with are
American issues?

Best

Rosner

My first reply did not imply that that was all Jewish institutions in America should deal with. If they are religious institutions, they will deal with religion. If they are community institutions, they will have more than their fair share of community activities. My point was, rather, to indicate that in pursuing their lives as Jewish institutions they will naturally intersect with American political and cultural questions. The character of the American Diaspora is such that Jews are not segregated. They are integrated. Owing to the relative success of the Jewish community in social, economic, and political terms as a community within American democracy, issues that affect American citizens will come into play. These issues will intersect with Jewish life in America. Among these issues are the quality of public education, investment in science and research, immigration policy, health care, the environment, and the like. There are particular issues, such as the relationship of religion and politics, ethnicity, pluralism and prejudice, and the support of culture and education, that have particular relevance to the Jewish community. So my point was that, in addition to the stated purposes of Jewish institutions in this country, the posture and the openness vis-à-vis questions affecting American life can influence the allegiance American Jews have to their communal and religious institutions. Jewish institutions might, as well, provide leadership on certain questions, as they did during the height of the civil rights movement in the 1960s.

Leon Botstein

Dear President Botstein,

A couple of months ago, writing about the JFN conference in Atlanta, I quoted you briefly as saying that “This is no longer an era in which people take pride in hating the synagogue they attend and to which they belong. If you don’t make them love your institution they will not attend.”

So here’s a soft-ball question we can start with: How do you make the people of this era love their (Jewish) institution?

Best,
Rosner

The question of how one “makes” or induces the Jews of America to feel some attachment to the institutions within the Jewish community can be answered only in a fragmentary manner. For those for whom being Jewish is a matter of religious faith, the issues of attachment will remain located in the nature of the synagogue, the temple, its leadership, its liturgy, its rabbi.

But if one asks the question vis-à-vis the nonreligious institutions, the community institutions that speak to an individual’s sense of his or her own identity as a Jew apart from religious conviction, then the answer is complicated indeed.

The vast majority of Jews in numerical terms are either members of the Reform movement or entirely unaffiliated. For them, an attachment to an institution that is Jewish is dependent on the extent to which it coheres in values with issues that are not in the narrow sense Jewish issues, but rather American political issues.

For example, those with conservative and neoconconservative political views who are unaffiliated in terms of a religious domination and are secular will attach themselves to Jewish institutions with positions in American politics, whether in terms of foreign or domestic policy, that reinforce that conservatism.

Likewise those institutions within the Jewish community that underscore values such as tolerance, civil liberties, and other so-called liberal values will find their likeminded partisans within the Jewish community.

The point is that for the unaffiliated, nonsectarian issues, the American political and cultural issues, are more important and define the potential connection to Jewish institutions.

The most controversial aspect of this dynamic is of course the issue of the American Jewish community’s reaction to the issues facing Israel.

It is my view that the Jewish community ought to resist the temptation to act in a reductive and classic manner as a diaspora community, much the way the Cuban and Irish communities have acted in times past and present.

Diaspora communities have a tendency to be out of step and out of date with their so-called original country abroad, and they become defensively reactionary. For anyone who spends a lot of time in Israel it becomes apparent that the Israelis have no difficulty debating among themselves.

The dinner table, the pages of the daily press, and the Winograd Commission are all emblems of the vitality of Israel’s democracy. It is estimated that 80 percent of Israelis would in a heartbeat welcome a withdrawal from the occupied areas in exchange for security and peace.

There is, as well, considerable Israeli movement intent on strengthening constitutional democracy in Israel by urging greater separation of church and state, the creation of a constitution and, for example, the institution of civil marriage. We, as Jews in America, need to mirror the same degree of mutual respect and the range of opinions that exists in Israel among those who, in the end, will stand together at the risk of their lives to defend their country.

One senses a greater level of intolerance here in American and in Jewish institutions to carry on the kind of debate that thrives in Israel. For a large segment of American Jews, loyalty to a Jewish institution here in America would be enhanced if that institution could exemplify the virtues of enthusiasm for dissent, debate, and openness.

What threatens the relation of Jewish institutions and probably the vast majority or American Jews is the frequent tendency among Jewish institutions in America to project a parochial, reductive, and simplified image of what it means to be Jewish or how one can actually be Jewish or in support of Israel.

In the end, a kind of narrow-minded provincialism replete with jokes about “them” and “us,” with anxieties about intermarriage and acculturation, and with a one-dimensional definition of support for Israel will in the end alienate younger and future generations of American Jews and Jewish institutions.

May 7, 2007

Daniel Septimus

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Daniel Septimus is the Editor in Chief of MyJewishLearning.com, “a personal gateway to Jewish exploration.” Septimus is a writer, educator, and book critic and was a founding editor of the site (bio web page here), which defines itself as “a trans-denominational website of Jewish information and education geared toward learners of all ages and educational backgrounds.”

We will discuss Jewish education and the state of American Judaism. Readers can send questions to rosnersdomain@haaretz.co.il.

Dear Daniel,

My question to you is this: what will be the role of Israel in the new era of Judaism you described, and isn’t it a problem that half the Jewish people can’t connect with the other half because of language?

Thank you,
Martha
New Jersey

Dear Martha,

I’ll start with your second question. There are certainly “connection problems” in the Jewish community, but language isn’t one I’m terribly concerned with. When in Jewish history has the entire Jewish people spoken a single language? Perhaps at one point we all spoke Aramaic, but that age is long gone.

There are many things that unite all Jews, but there are a heck of a lot of things that differentiate us from each other, as well. This is a fact. Is it a problem? Sometimes. But sometimes difference can be productive. Which brings me to your first question.

Israel is interesting because in some ways it is a model for a democratized Judaism: every day, non-rabbis - political leaders, business leaders, secular and religious - make decisions that impact the fate of the Jewish people. In this sense, Israel is a paradigm for what it means to empower all Jews to shape the future of Jewish life.

On the other hand, Israel has a more entrenched religious leadership, a leadership that is empowered by the State with control over ritual, lifecycle eve